Surrogates [Review]

Surrogates is a sci-fi action thriller starring Bruce Willis . An adaption of Robert Venditti's graphic novel of the same name. Surrogates is one of those future set; thought provoking movies about mankind and the advent of a new technology that is wildly accepted by many but looked at in disgust by few. Essentially Surrogates is this:

I, Robot - Will Smith + Bruce Willis / Less explosions = Surrogates

And really that's not truly a bad thing cause while I enjoyed I, Robot; perhaps if Bruce Willis was in it instead of Smith it might've been better, cause lets face it when you think of Bruce Willis you think of the bad ass cop who has saved are asses from terrorists four times.


Yippie Ky-Yay Muther Fucker

And when you think of Will Smith; well come on you know what you think of; do you really need a picture? Anyways; in Surrogates the world is revolutionized by robot avatars called "Surrogates"; robots that a human essentially 'becomes' you know like in James Cameron's Avatar. Everyone has them except a group of humans who deem them a disgrace and live in squaller; savage looking reservations in each major city; all led by Ving Rhames. A new weapon is discovered that not only can destroy a Surrogates body and also frying it's 'brain's' inner workings but also can kill the user themselves. Bruce Willis plays FBI Agent Tom Greer who begins investigating the murder of the son of the man who invented the surrogates; who is played by the same guy who created Robots in I, Robot geez he's really smart eh? Anyway this is where it starts to become one of those movies where a simple plot device; a murder; turns into an unravaling mystery. Willis eventually discovers that SPOILER: The guy who invented Surrogates is the one who ultimately got his son killed. It turns out that Ving Rhames is really a Surrogate to the inventor and acts as a prophet for humanity of the Surrogates end. He does this after becoming disenchanted with the corporation who manufactures the Surrogates after a disagreement: In short he made them so people with disabilities, like himself, could lead a normal life the company, VIS, wanted to manufacture them for everyone. So the plot thickens as Willis discovers that his Superior at the FBI, who is apparently leaving to work for VIS, had hired someone to kill the Inventor but mistakenly killed his son.


There's a subplot to the main story involving Willis feeling emotionally distant from his wife; wanting to actually be with her in person instead of through their Surrogates. It's revealed later that the two had a son who died in a car accident which explains why his wife prefers to use Surrogates so that she wont loose him the same way; but it seems as well that shes become so adjusted to Surrogate life that she comes off as a bitch instead of someone with a deep problem. It really lacks any memorable moments with the exception of some Surrogates demostrating their feats of strength which are pretty much the same ones that the Robots in I, Robot do. Really the movie at the end comes off as it's lacking something. I can't put my finger on what it really is. The design of the movie is really good though. It's set in the near future but everything really looks the same as it does now as far as cities. Which sets it apart from other Future set Sci-Fi movies because really that's what the future will look like, lets be realistic about it ok? But just like every other future movie everything pretty much as followed the "iPod Touch" style interface. It's pretty good, but not memorable I'd reccomend watching it if you're looking for a good action movie only if the stores are out of something like From Paris With Love. Surrogates gets a 3/5.

3OH!3 - MY FIRST KISS feat. Ke$ha (Official Music Video)

3OH!3 Streets of Gold [Review]

Note: The entire album is available for everyone to listen to on youtube pre-release.
The boys from Ballerado are back with their sophmore album due out next week on the 29th; Streets of Gold. After months of waiting its almost here and I hope you wear a helmet when you listen to it cause its gonna blow your mind....


Anyway.

Once in a rare time does an album come out that could potentially produce a hit single from every song. I believe that this is one of those rare albums. Want, was a great cd but a lot of the tracks on it werent exactly mainstream enough for that type of exposure. Streets of Gold is however. Almost every song is great; the only one that sort of falls flat of having that type of deal is "House Party" while at the same time being an awesome song itself, I just couldn't see the mainstream music media latching onto it. With that being said, there are some very good songs on this disc; while at the same time they devert from their style that makes them notable in my opinion. Tracks like "Dont Trust Me" and "Starrstrukk" from Want were well produced and main stream enough to draw in people; including me. But what did I find when I listened to that whole album? A foundry of awesome and different songs the likes of which I had never herd before. They're satirical style made me fall in love with their music instantly. While Streets of Gold does have some that style they have swapped their singing and musical style with something more main stream. But that's not really a bad thing now.

Beaumont and I can do anything lead the album off, Beaumont being an instrumental track while I Can Do Anything being the proper first song. ICDA(I can do anything) is a good opening track; it introduces you to their new musical style while keeping their same satirical nature from Want. With lines like "We can do an album; we can do a viral; Spread it like an STD you got back in highschool." And also introduces us to what probably is their attitude to people who would say "Why dont you go back to the "Want" style." with their lyrics of the chorus "I aint gonna take no shit no one." serving as a great shout out to people who might be thinking that way.

The lead off single from the album; My First Kiss; is next, and serves as a real introduction to their new style with ICDA being kind of like a "fuck you we'll do whatever we want." Ke$ha makes a cameo in the song; likely returning the favor to the group for appearing on "Blah Blah Blah". If you were like me, you were a bit dissapointed that the boys didnt have too many lines in that song; but Ke$ha dosen't pull a Katy Perry here and take over a part of the song. Outside of singing the lines "My first kiss went a little like this....and twist." She also harmonizes with Sean Foremen in the Chorus. The song itself is good, and catchy. A perfect lead off single for the group. Likely it'll do the same that "Dont Trust Me" did for Want; but just like "Dont Trust Me" got the group a lot of attention, and Starrstrukk blew them up the next song will eclipse all three in terms of popularity....

(Note: check the post below for the official My First Kiss video)


"I think I've been here before; I think I've run into you; I know the things that you do; cause this is Deja Vu!" Deja Vu, the third single from the album. It has the structure; rythem and catchy chorus; memorable lines like "And the girl in the back you'll stick your tounge down my mouth" make this one of their best songs I believe. It defenantly has the potential to not only go to the top of the charts but also put their other songs out of peoples minds. In the song itself it describes a night that the character in it feels like hes living over and over; Asking a police officer when hes finally got get arrested for doing 'bad things' despite the fact that said officer has had run-ins with the character a lot; Getting into a fight with a greaser in the bar, and getting kicked out of said bar, everynight it seems. It's a great narrative about how the bands life probably seems to have been blurred together in their travels as a constant re-living experience or ...Deja Vu.

We Are Young; the next track, and the first track that completely deviates from their style in a musical sense. Opening with a nice drum beat and a bass line thats reminenct of "eye of the tiger" through out the song. It's different from what their other songs are from Want, and the first three tracks provide a nice safety net that ease you into the new style of the album. The song itself is about the young people taking on the world; you get a nice feel as to this is how they both felt when they started making music together and signed to a deal.

Touching on My is a song done somewhat in their original noted style from Want. It was the second single released, and I believe the weakest of those released thus far. The song itself is catchy and the beat is good; but it just feels like its missing something; dunno what tho. The song itself is somewhat 'censord'; with electronic 'beeps' replacing where the curse words would be but the beeps themselves are also intagreated into the beat so even when they arent suppose to be 'cursing' it appears. This censoring somewhat surprises me considering how the language was in Want. But then again it could be because of their appearance on the Alice in Wonderland soundtrack with their song "Follow Me Down", which In my opinion is their worst song; was quite requested on radio disney; peaking at number 2; and overall with the exception of "house party" generally the album is pretty clean of profanity. Overall I feel it is one of the weakest songs on the album but its still pretty good.

"Gonna have a house party in my house..." opens the next track; house party. It's pretty basic really and kicks back to their style of songs from Want. Really theres not much to comment on cause its a fun song but repetitive; would be good though for a house party....

R.I.P. seems like a reflective song from the bands point of view about a women who they left behind in Colorado to pursue their dreams of music. But also criticizing the women at the same time for not feeling the same way about the singer. It's a pretty good song and could be a chartable love song.


I know how to say is the next song. This one is a fun, fun song. Its got a lot of different styles mixed in. Some kick backs to the doors with the keyboarding, An jingle of bells that reminds me of Rollin' Stones "Symphony for the Devil"; speaking of the stones, the lyrics "Never gonna stop; I'm a rolling stone" is catchy itself. The narrative in this one lets you into the band's lives about how they are always traveling, telling stories of how they love many women in different parts of the world. Only one word really describes this song; Fun.

Double Vision; original I thought it was gonna be a Foreigner cover, but it wasn't. Instead this song opens with a bright ray of sunshine. It reminds me of one of those feel good songs for somereason and it should be since the singer is surrounded by so "Many fine women". But it does have a message about relationships, in that he loves the girl in the song yet he dosent think he can have a relationship because hes surrounded by so many fine women that hes seeing "Double Vision"

I'm Not the One; is pretty good, musically its kind of a slow and methodical love song about telling someone they're not the one to 'hurt you'. Nothing realy notable about the song but it is good and continues the same style established earlier in the album. Streets of Gold, the next song finally sees "Nat" step up as the singer as he mostly stays in background for most of album only backing up Sean. I put these two together in one part of the review because while they're good songs and defeantly can be a single in their own right theres just nothing about either one that sticks out as in the other songs.

See You Go; the penultimate song; Brings you back to the 3Oh!3 style in the begining while later blending with their newer style. It's a good song and catchy; but kinda falls into the same category as "I'm not the one" and "Streets of Gold" with a similar narative from "RIP" Only from their prospective completely telling a lover that they got everything they need, so dont go.

Love 2012 is about as close to an "epic" song you'll get from 3Oh!3; the beat is great and the lyrics are good; and just like those predictions of the 2012 apocalypse its just that. A love apocalypse, a song about love ending and the singer finding that in the end he needs himself more than someone else right now. A great closing song to a great album and really ties together the narratives set up in My First Kiss; that continue through the entire cd.


Overall the Album is great; And it's actually a great concept album; something that if Want had it, well you really had to dig to connect the story. Begining with start of a love with My First Kiss and ending with it all falling apart in Love 2012. Every song really connects with each other. While in Want I was drawn into that album with "Dont Trust me" and "Starrstrukk" and found a great unexpected album, Streets of Gold really illustrates how the band has matured over the past two years since Want's release. Every song has a narrative; something that Want kind of lacked, but at the same time I loved that album for that reason, and love this one for having one. The only complaint I have is that Nathan, "Nat" takes a back seat to Sean Foreman. Granted Foreman is in my opinion a better singer, and overall a better pick for a frontman of the group, I loved Nat's vocal style in Want and it is missed in this Album but at the same time hes made some great beats so it's not like hes not there. Overall this Album is great, Want allowed 3Oh!3 to get noticed by mainstream but Streets of Gold will totally blow them up even bigger. I dont want to sound too over-confident in the album but I believe 3Oh!3 could own 2010 just as much as Lady Gaga owned 2009 in their genre but that'll be a hard climb to make and it's only up to the fans to decide if they do. Streets of Gold drops next week; Tuesday, June 29th 2010. You can pick up the deluxe edition exclusively from www.3oh3music.com. And Target is running an incredible deal on it for 7.99 next week. Streets Of Gold gets a 5/5

Defendor [REVIEW]

Woody Harrelson comes fresh off his career-reviving role in Zombieland with the dark comedy/super hero drama, Defendor. Defendor got its first trailer not long after Kick Ass, another satrical look at super heroes, got its first; however, Defendor was far less hyped, had a much smaller budget, and got pushed in and out of theaters far quick February of this year. Having not seen Kick Ass yet, I can't compare the two films, and despite the fact that both involve regular people portraying realistic vigilantes in a comedic light, I've been told they're both far different films.

Defendor, at its core, is an homage of sorts to two DC classics, most obviously Batman, although, also the Watchmen, notably Rorschach. Woody Harrelson's Defendor is an innocent, albeit moderately slow grown men who never had anyone to idolize in his life other than our modern legends, that of comic book super heroes. Not to give away any spoilers, but he never knew his father, his mother was taken from him at a young age, and he was raised by his stubborn, bitter old grandfather. Taking both elements of Batman and Rorschach's histories, Arthur Poppington (Harrelson's true idenity) is a combination of both those character if they were less batshit crazy, and had more childlike innocence.

Defendor is looking for his arch-enemy, Captain Industry, which is nothing more than an industry for the drug game. He goes around beating the shit out of lowly criminals, before one night saving a crackwhore (well, she is) from a corrupt cop/dopeboy. This starts off the film's main story, and also establishes our heroes' kinda love interest, in a creepy "I'm old enough to be her father, so we'll never genuinely embrace" way. Also, the crackwhore is played by the lovely Kat Dennings, of Nick and Norah fame.

oh, those ashy lips.

Regardless, Defendor finds his Captain Industry, and hunts him till the bitter end. Honestly, this film is just fucking great. Woody Harrelson's career has been rejuvenated, and thank God for that. The man is just an amazing comedic/action star, and he's just so capable of making the audience feel sympathy for his character. Between this and Tallahasse, Harrelson is back in prime-form, and needs to keep getting these great starring roles to further enforce his standing. Woody's proven himself to be Ron Perlman levels of bad-ass, and deserves that same attention and respect.

The writing/directing, handled by Peter Stebbings, a first time director, is genuinely excellent. Very atmospheric, and moody when it needs to be, while the comedic timing is still precise. The supporting cast is great at keeping the film rooted in reality, when Defendor's antics can get intentionally campy. It's hard to pick out any flaws with Defendor; it runs a perfect length, and tells a fantastic original story, something we hardly ever get in the superhero genre.

From the wildly hilarious beginning to the downer, yet mildly uplifting climax, Defendor never loses its focus. It's a great movie that takes the conventions of modern super hero films, and throws them out the window. I'd definitely recommending buying the DVD to any fan of comedy or super heroes, as this is a film you'll want to watch again and again.

Date Night [REVIEW]

The king and queen of NBC's primetime Thursday TV schedule hook up for their first movie together, and it's about as great as you'd expect. Date Night is a rom-com/crime thriller that goes above and beyond most Hollywood comedies in terms of quality, and genuine hilarity. And honestly, after looking at the credits for this film, and considering the plot, it's rather surprising how well this film turned out in the end.

With the director of such horrible comedic failures such as the Night at the Museum movies, Cheaper By The Dozen, and the Pink Panther, and a writer whose only other contributions have been to Shrek The Third, this film looks like it's built for disaster on paper. And honestly, is the directing or the writing top notch? Although the plot is never genuinely overlooked, it's many twists and turns are elementary at best, and some of the scenes would be generely worthless if they weren't readily available for comedic purposes. The directing is nothing ground-breaking, but it holds up well, and all of the scenes are shot with the same flair that was used in the Night at the Museum movies, just in a far more reasonable and rational film.

What really sets this film apart is the all-star cast it sports; Steve Carell (of the Office and The 40 Year Old Virgin) and Tina Fey (of 30 Rock and Saturday Night Live) star in this film, and their supporting cast is absolutely crammed. Ray Liotta, Mark Wahlberg, James Franco, Mila Kunis, and Taraji P. Henson are some of the most noteworthy of this ensemble cast, and all of them hand in first-class performances even when they're not given the the greatest of characters. All of them add another dimension to their characters that make them take off of the screen, and everyone else in the film is equally good.

This is virtually a two-man show though at heart, and you'd think that Fey and Carell have been working together for years with the undeniable chemistry they have in this film. They play the role of a couple lacking excitement in their lives to perfection in the beginning of the film, although their characters aren't too much of a departure from their starring NBC roles. Later in the film, when it comes time for the two to provide more of a connection, they deliver two of the best performances of their career.

Although this film relies heavily on sight gags, the jokes are still sharp, and that's obviously due to the improvisation that both Carell and Fey are famous for. Despite there be so many jokes that rely on the actions taking place on screen, all of them are handled tastefully, and the film never delves off into slap-stick territory. Despite the fact that the plot is very exaggerated, and unlikely, the movie does keep one foot rooted in reality while allowing the unimaginable to help to the characters in the film in the meantime. That's where this film gets most of its charm, too; nothing is unbelievable, but anything that can go wrong, does.

This film stands amongst Pineapple Express and the Hangover as some of the best comedy adventures to have come out in the last two years, and stands out as its own seperate entity due to the romantic comedy elements. Rom-coms are hardly ever this clever, or gut-bustingly funny, and this is one of the few films that take the buddy comedy-approach and simply add a couple in their place. In an age where bromance movies are all the rage, Date Night is pretty damn charming,  and commendable for showing that romantic mishaps can be just as funny as drug or alcohol induced escapades.

Gucci Mane - The Burrprint 2: HD [REVIEW]

Gucci Mane. A genius to some, a retard to others. Very few rappers (outside of Lil' Wayne and Cam'ron, who're his most contemporary peers) have ever attracted this much split affection/hatred, and very few can actually grasp the idea of him as an artist. On the surface, he's a very shallow artist, who can't stop rapping about his jewelry, cars, women, or trap-roots. He's hard to decipher (at times, nearly indecipherable), because his accent is rooted in an Alabama slur, he has a lisp, and his delivery, which varies on nearly every song he appears on, is a slivering, sliding, snake-like whisper which rarely breaks free from the monotony of his inflection.

His character is that of a real life villain. He has killed at least one person in his life (in self-defense), he's stolen pretty much every dude in Atlanta's girlfriend for at least a night, he wears more jewelry than Liberace, he has more money than the last five generations of your family tree, and he probably sold crack to your grandma. He's a very easy target for hip-hop purists, and he's simply a very easy individual to hate. He's an asshole, and he doesn't give a fuck what you think; honestly, he's that bad-ass that almost every man has wanted to be at least one point in their lives. 

But he's also probably one of the most honest, and unadulerated artists in any genre of music. He's gained an extremely loyal cult fanbase that rivals that of the aforementioned Lil' Wayne and Cam'ron, and last year, after all that grinding, he finally broke into the mainstream and he's now getting the attention he deserves. He's honestly one of the most personable artists I've ever listened to; when you listen to Gucci's music, you feel like you know him. How can you get so attached to someone that's lived a life that makes most others look insignificant in comparison? Because at the end of each album, mixtape, or song, it is abundantly clear; Gucci Mane is no super villain, he's merely a human. 

He's as fragile, and frail as the rest of us; but he is simply a survivor. Listening to Gucci lets you live vicariously through his lyrics; each song is a triumph in itself. His self-depreciating lyrics, deadpan sense of humor, and very understated intelligence makes him one of the most vulnerable artists in hip-hop. At the same time, his "don't give a fuck what anyone thinks" attitude pretty much tells you that you can try to take a swing at him; but you're likely to end up dead behind the local middle school if you do. That same attitude also allows him to make some of the strangest, experimental, and quite simply avant garde rap the genre has ever seen. Don't misunderstand that, this isn't arthouse rap; this isn't music that's trying to be smart. This is very self-aware trap rap that is merely a veil for a man who's afraid to get too personal on his records, so he merely drops the struggles he's faced in his life amidst all the gun and jewelry talk, usually to the point that if you're not listening (and most Gucci fans AND haters aren't listening) you'll completely miss it.

In all of his interviews, you see someone that's nothing like the Gucci Mane character that is so predominant in his music. You see Radric Davis, the thirty year old who is soft-spoken, well-educated, and surprisingly wise beyond his years. He's lived five lifetimes in those thirty years; this is a man who had to grow up from the time he was just a child, and never had the opportunity to look back. And maybe this is why his fanbase is so loyal, so attached to him; because he's just so damn relatable.

Gucci's in jail right now, and this is a compilation of songs that he recorded late last year, all of them showing the VERY huge leap he took as an artist from sometime in mid-08 until late-09. There's about a dozen guest features, yet it doesn't feel like it; maybe because over half of them are on the all-star trap anthem "Coca Coca." This mixtape combines all of Gucci's styles, and flows, and puts it in an easily digestable format. From the intro, which is a live freestyle from jail over the phone (including the "One Minute Remaining" message for authenticity), until the very last song, this is a journey into Gucci Land. Weird metaphores, outbursts of singing, GENUINE singing on Antisocial, which is one of the strangest songs in all of Gucci's huge catalog, a whole dictionary full of adlibs, some of the best beats in modern hip-hop supplied by Drumma Boy, Fat Boi, and the rest of Gucci's usual suspects.

There is far too many songs to do a track by track analysis, and honestly, Gucci is the type of artist who is better understood by listening to a full album instead of listening to individual tracks. Simply put, there's something for everyone on hear, and this is just some of the funnest music you'll hear all year long. It's obvious before he got locked up, Gucci was feeling on top of the world, and this mixtape shows that. But then again, when isn't he?

Support the kid. This is some of the best music you'll hear all year, and just makes the wait for him to get out even more unbearable. At least until then we have The Burrprint 2; another defining statement by one of hip-hop's most misunderstood artists.

The Broke Gamer Review: Mirror's Edge

Usually I post some video game reviews under the title "Cheap ass games", but I've decided to re-title the posts as "The Broke Gamer Review".




It's a Friday night, you've got nothing to do, and can only spare about 20 dollars, its time to head down to your local video game store and pick up something cheap for your broke ass. Welcome to The Broke Gamer Review.



Mirror's Edge is an action platformer presented in a First Person view format. Make no mistakes this is no first person shooter. Retailing for about 17.99 (Used at Gamestop) Mirror's Edge is a fun and fast paced video game for under twenty dollars. Sometime in the future you play as Faith, a runner. Runner's are like couriers but they get to shoot people, better think twice about stiffing the bike messenger next time. They run here, run there. Giving people info, taking info, generally doing things against the 'law' in this city. Faith becomes caught up in a scandal when her sister is framed for killing a would be Mayoral Candidate and she is looking for the real killer and answers as to why her sister was framed.

Now, I said it's not a first person shooter, but there are guns you can use in the game. However the entire game is based on running, and no it's not some treacherous Nintendo deal that disguises exercise as a video game. You run everywhere, and anytime you have a gun it slows you down, the bigger the gun the slower you run. In fact the entire game pretty much tells you to avoid the enemy at all costs, unless you cant help but not to. Basically youll run everywhere, and jump over everything. It's a great experience to be had. The game is totally different and unique from any other. The city is pure White, beautiful colors mixed in with it as well. It gives the game an overall look that separates it from other things out there. And the cut scenes, are all done in an anime style format, no CGI which itself gives it something that separates it from other games.

The running is highly addictive and when you're on a roll, it really sucks to get stopped just cause you didnt jump at the right point, or ducked too early, and youll just stop, it makes it worse when theres enemies shooting at you, and you're more than likely to get killed when something slows you down. And you better hope that you can grab that ledge if not youll fall all the way to ground at a velocity that probably liquefies Faith. The story itself is forgettable, and theres no interesting characters in it that really make you want to continue the story, however the gameplay drives the story itself. FPS fans might be turned off when they find out that it isnt a run and gun adventure game. And if you get motion sickness really easy I wouldn't recommend playing it. The developers put a little dot in the center of the screen, giving the illusion of a cross-hair, to make you focus on that area so you wont get sick, but still it could be hard for those who suffer from the illness to play it. And the dot, despite looking like a cross hair, isn't. It's just there for that purpose, trying to aim with it is about fifty-fifty on accuracy.

Overall it's a great game that sets it apart from anything out there, but nothing story or character wise is truly memorable, and it seems sometimes that even if you nail the button right and jump right the game will still make you miss your target, or hit something to slow you down. Mirror's Edge gets a 3/5.

MGMT - Congratulations [REVIEW]

A lot of people aren't going to like this album, and most of those people were fans of Oracular Spectacular. However, if you weren't on the MGMT bandwagon before this album, I wouldn't hop on here, either. This album is strictly MGMT; a very immersive, and overindulgent affair by Andrew VanWyngarden and Ben Goldwasser, that is as self-aware and paranoid as its predecessor, yet far more personal, and adventurous.

It starts off with the first transition listeners will have into MGMT's far more folk-driven experience, which is It's Working. It's one of the less experimental efforts on the album, and feels more like something on Oracular Spectacular than anything else; at the same time, it's lush landscape, and beautiful vocals make this a grand introduction to what's about to follow. The "surfer-rock with gothic undertones" vibe starts with this song, and never lets up. If you threw The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, the Beach Boys, Pink Floyd, The Flaming Lips, and Nine Inch Nails into a blender, you might be able to come up with half of the elements that the following 8 tracks of this album is about to comprise of. 

A Song For Dan Treacy, based on Television Personalites frontman, Dan Treacy, follows. Here's where the album really starts to distanct MGMT from its roots; if anyone remembers that scene in Tim Burton's Ed Wood where Vampira waves her hands frantically to entrance viewers while that demonically groovy music plays in the background, this is basically that, but with MGMT. 

 Someone's Missing & Flash Delirium follow, and these two songs are possibly the most single-ready of an album with no singles. The former is a beautiful, yet tragically short song that takes all of the best elements of the bands sound, and has Andrew tell a great story lyrically over one of the album's most beautiful arrangements. The latter is the first song leaked from the album, and it's just fucking fantastic. Like a bad-trip gone awkardly right, Flash Delirium is one of the most hauntingly funny songs I've heard in my twenty-one years, including lyrics such as the "hot dog's getting cold," followed by self-aware lyrics like "you'll never be as good as the Rolling Stones." I'll be damned if they aren't trying.

I Found A Whistle maybe the least grabbing song on the album, although it is also one of the more eclectic ones. It stood out to me more than most of the songs on first listen, however, it's lacking the power that the rest of the album really charges with. Siberian Breaks follows, and it's a 12 minute opus. Some people say that this track feels bloated, and I can emphasize. However, in that twelve minute running time, MGMT manages to include almost all of the elements of their past work, and run with it in a song that is just extravagent more-so than self-indulgent.

Brian Eno follows, and it's probably my favorite song on the album. Based on the super-producer who helped expand the ambient music genre, Brian Eno sounds like a dark retelling of the Munsters theme thematically, and tells an absolutely hilarious, and depraved tale lyrically. Brian Eno is something of a God in MGMT's world, and this song honestly reminds me, at least lyrically, of early Primus records. A goofy song that neither satires or parodies anyone or anything, and still goes about it in a very serious, and enjoyable way. Brian Eno is like MGMT's Mr. Krinkle.

Lady Dada's Nightmare, which is awarded with the best song title of the year, is an instrumental piece of work done by the band. Perhaps inspired by Lady GaGa (y'think?), although this song sounds nothing at all like her music; it provides a sparse, surrealistic sound in the beginning, and gets downright demented in the second half, which is filled with gruesome screams of terror. Although the band doesn't provide any lyrics in this song, this is one of my personal favorites from the album; this does sound like a soundtrack to anyone's nightmares, and most of mine do include Lady GaGa.

Congratulations ends with the title track, which is one of the easiest listens of the whole album. Very laid back, and celebratory, this is basically the bend looking back at the past two years of their career, both scathingly, and with reluctance. It's obvious that MGMT never wanted to end up where they're at in their career, and hope to change their stance as hipster demigods with this album by half-alienating their fanbase, and half revealing who they really are. It's a fantastic song that caps of an absolutely breathtaking album.

Congratulations isn't for everyone. To keep it short, it's absolutely FUCKING WEIRD. Magestic at the same time, this is MGMT's most cohesive effort yet, and they completely derail the idea of a sophomore slump. I'd suggest checking out OS if you haven't listened to the band yet, as it's far, far easier to digest than it's successor. However, after you're familiar with the band and their eccentricities, give Congratulations a few spins. This maybe the early album of the year in any genre.

Meth, Ghost & Rae - Wu-Massacre [REVIEW]

I love the Wu-Tang Clan. One of the very first hip-hop acts I ever listened to; Enter the 36 Chambers also being one of the first albums I've ever heard. Their debut, and every album leading up until their second group effort, Wu-Tang Forever, is classic, almost flawless displays in what hip-hop is capable of when fully utilized. GZA, RZA, Ol' Dirty Bastard, Raekwon, Ghostface Killah, and Method Man were always at the forefront of the group, while Masta Killa, U-God, and Inspectah Deck played the lesser known, but still great soldiers; the first sect of that group, the cousins, have changed a lot during the years. ODB unfortunately passed away, while GZA fell off into monotony and RZA decided to film movie scores instead of focus on albums, since the former career is far more lucrative. The second is the group we'll be discussing today.

Ghostface Killah has always been the most consistent of anyone on the Wu-Tang; he really has never released a bad album, and yes, I'm including Ghostdini. His oft-P.I.C. Raekwon has two classics under his belt, the landmark Only Built 4 Cuban Linx and its sequel. Method Man is probably the most well known of all the Wu-Tang, as he has become something of a household name since "M.E.T.H.O.D. Man" dropped 18 years ago. In 2010, they're really the best the Wu has to offer. Which is what makes this album rather dissapointing.

Now, is it their fault this album doesn't live up to expectations? Not completely, no. A lot of the blame rests on Def Jam's shoulders. They rushed the project along, and hyped it up in epic proportions. They're really expecting great sales, or media attention from this album, so they've released FOUR singles, 3 alternate album covers, one music video, and one promotional mixtape since this project was announced three months ago. All of these covers were designed by famed comic book artist, Chris Bachalo, of Generation X & Death fame. Four singles were released, that makes up one-third of this 12 track album; and two of those tracks are 30 second skits.

So, yes, there's around 30 minutes, at most, of music on this project. 6 of the 10 songs clock in at under 3 minutes long; which hurts the product extremely, especially with tracks like Criminology 2.5 and Mef Vs. Chef 2, both of which are only 2 minutes long. I suppose they live up to the "2" in their names.

None of the songs really grab you, at all. A part of the problem really is the incredibly-aggitating length of the records, which, I don't understand how they completely blame Def Jam for. Did Def Jam really cut Criminology 2.5 in HALF because of time restraints? I doubt it. I have no idea why Raekwon's verse was cut off, nor why Ghost's was taken from No Man's Land, a bonus cut off of OB4CL2. Mef Vs. Chef 2 has the best production on the album, but 2:01 is NOT enough. It feels like an interlude. In fact, most rappers' interludes are longer than most of these songs. This is hard to classify as genuine MUSIC at this length. I understand that They wanted to show off their liquid swords, but damn guys, HOW HARD IS IT TO ADD A FUCKING HOOK?

And talk about more than fucking guns already, huh? We know, you're raw. You're hard. You're the hardest rappers out there. But honestly, you criticize Waka Flocka for not having lyrics, and saying rappers of your ilk are outta touch, when you're not covering any ground that Waka or any of these other young "trappers, not rappers" are covering, and you can't even afford the time to write a hook. Honestly, you guys ARE out of touch, no matter how much it hurts me to say that. The difference being that these other rappers are in their early to mid twenties, and you guys are almost old enough to be their fathers. Come on guys, grow up.

I don't understand it, honestly. OB4CL2 was fantastic, and Ghostdini was a great approach in another direction for Ghost. Those albums came out about 6 months ago, respectively. And this is what they come up with as a follow up? You can't completely blame Def Jam for this, and their time restraints. Even with more songs, these guys weren't really going anywhere with this effort. In fact, there really isn't any effort. It comes off more as a quick attempt to grab cash from hardcore Wu-heads by Meth, Ghost, Rae AND Def Jam. I feel like they're all in cohoots to rob us, especially with all the hyped and alternate cover BS going into this project. The marketing is better than the overall product. If only Def Jam put this much effort into their GREAT albums.

It's not all bad, don't get me wrong. Dangerous, Miranda, It's That Wu-Shit, and Our Dreams are all pretty good, if not kinda generic. There's just nothing really great about this album, either. It's just kinda, blah. I doubt anyone'll be listening to this album past April, if they even remember it for anything other than being a failed marketing ploy.

Sorry, Wu. But you left me down this time, and I'm sure you left plenty others down, too. Try harder next time, and try to take some of the blame for once, huh? These are the same guys who blamed RZA entirely for 8 Diagrams being a dissapointment, yet I'd listen to that album again over this.

Heavy Rain review

Finally. One of the most anticipated games of 2010 was released this past Tuesday, February 23rd. But does it live up to the hype and expectations? Heavy Rain, not only does so but mows down all of those as well. Heavy Rain is the story of a serial killer who is going around abducting young children and murdering them by allowing them to drown. The story revolves around four different characters who are all connected through the murders. And each of them plays out in a different genre of film. No not game, film. To say Heavy Rain is a "Game" in a traditional sense, would be a wrong classification. The developer, Quantic Dream, calls it an "interactive narritive", while this isnt exactly the most sexiest of terms, it is what it is. The entire game is played out through Quick Time Events(QTE) which if you dont know are usually, as seen in Resident Evil 5, are an interactive cutscene that requires you to press a button at a precise time and depending on if you hit it or not, you either succeede or fail. However unlike other games, if you miss a button press, the scene dosent rewind back and allow you to hit it again, in order to get it right, the story keeps going. It keeps going even the event of a death of one of the characters. Quantic Dream's development team has stated that plays should only play through it once, because the character death's are perminant, in the current play through, and playing it once is like life. But you wont want to do that.
With all the different outcomes it makes you want to play it more to see what happens. A friend of mine who has the game, had a different ending, and story all together because we both did different things. I lost a character, he didnt. He chose to shoot someone that I did not, etc. It makes the game interesting. And gives something to players that very few games have, an individual story. It makes it like your own personal game, yours will be different from others, giving you and other plays a unique take on the Heavy Rain game.

As I stated, each character plays out as a different style of a movie.

Ethan Mars an architect whose son has been kid-napped, and hes giving clues on where to go, and things to do in order to save him. Ethan's story plays out a little like a horror movie. Not so much in the slasher style, but more of a psychological theme. He must crawl over glass, walk through an electrical field, kill a drug dealer, etc. It plays out somewhat like the Saw movies, only less gruesome.
Scott Shelby is a Private Detective investigating the case of the Origami Killer, the name of the serial killer. His story plays out more like a old Humphrey Bogart movie. He runs leads, tracks down suspects. Hell his car and house look like they come right out of the fifties. He is joined by a young woman named Lauren Winters, whose child was also kidnapped by the killer, and killed before the events of the game. Together they form a team, bent on finding the killer.

Norman Jayden is a FBI agent who comes to the city to help the local police with the case. His parts play out like a cop movie, something like The Departed. He dosen't get along at all with the people hes working for, and has a nasty run in with a man named Mad Jack. The only thing missing from Jayden's story is Mark Walhberg.

"Maybe, maybe not. Maybe fuck yourself"

Madison Paige is a concerned third party, so to speak, who finds Ethan hurt and helps him get better, while tracking down some leads of her own. Her story plays out like a thriller. And is easily the most intense of all the game.

The gameplay, well isnt as easy as you think for a bunch of QTEs. The button presses sometimes are so far apart from each other when you have to press more than one, making harder. But this only happens in a really intense situation, so its not like walking is going to have this style of button presses; giving you a sense of rewarding. Because when your in trouble, and those buttons come up, well it looks like you wont survive. And when you do, it gives you an overwhelming feeling of winning. And when you dont, well. You feel bad. But there are also happy moments. Especially the ending, which I wont reveal. But its as close to coming to crying that I have come to, playing a VIDEO GAME. Never, ever have I ever thought about doing that while playing a game. But this one evokes that Much emotion. It wasn't enough to make me shed a tear, but still I think you get the point. There are some downfalls however. Sometimes it seems the button presses dont match up when you press them. And it does becoming incredibly difficult in intense situations. It's not something to take lightly like any other game. It's hard, and dosent get any easier as you continue. Overall, this is a reason to own a PS3 I believe. Along with some other games. Basically:

Heavy Rain + Metal Gear Solid 4 + Uncharted 2 = why the fuck don't you own a PS3?

Heavy Rain for the Playstation 3 gets a 5/5.

Next Day Air [REVIEW]

Heavy cocaina shawty. Next Day Air is the first film in awhile to revive the coke-flick, and one of the few to take a comedic approach to it. It's no Scarface or New Jack City, and Benny Boom, a great music video director, is certainly no Brian De Palma or Mario Van Peebles; however, the lighter approach taken to the genre is refreshing, and the cast of black and hispanic actors are all up-to-standards, and in certain cases, above (why doesn't Mike Epps get more roles like this? Why doesn't Mike Epps get a genuinely good comedy script that focuses on him as the star? Such a squandering of good talent).

Next Day Air is collage film that takes cues from the Tarantino-style of film building, meshing together multiple stories about gangsters and gentlemen (or in this case, NDA workers who smoke too much hashis on their deliveries), and have them all meet up in the end for the obligatory shoot-out. Some directors have made a career out of this Tarantinosplotation; Guy Richie being the most famous, and successful of these, Joe Carnahan another. While many try to immitate Quentin to mockingly bad results, Benny Boom makes the adaption to the big screen transition much smoother than I originally expected. Although none of the film-making is breath taking, or even down-right compelling, the sense of comedic-timing is there, and most of the shoots are decent enough, especially the derivative shoot-out near the end.

As I said before, the acting is very competent, something rarely seen in these types of comedies outside the obvious notable exceptions (Friday, uh... Barbershop?). Mike Epps is fantastic in his role as Brodie, and his homeboy, Guch, played by Wood Harris. Donald Faison, of Scrubs, is humorous in the lead role, although not nearly as eye-grabbing as his fellow NDA associate, Mos Def, is in his few scene-stealing moments. Yasmin Deliz is beautiful, and provides her job as eye-candy throughout the film; she's a decent young actress who I hope to see more of (and I mean that literally). Omari Hardwick is the real star of this film though; he has a presence that most of his peers on this film lack, and his character, Shavoo, is probably my favorite in the film. He reminds me of a young Denzel, and with roles in both Kick-Ass and the A-Team in 2010, it looks like he's on for far greater things.

Not this great, though.

The score is nothing memorable, and the movie does lack that laugh-out-loud type of humor that it so desperately craves; it's a good film, which provides a few smiles, but at times it may've sufficed better with darker humor. The characters were mostly too hardened to believe they were as genuinely stupid as they were portrayed, but I guess at the same time, if this film wasn't light-hearted it's comedic approach might've gotten lost in all the drug-dealing shenanigans. Although I appreciate the approach at a cocaine-comedy, it really turned out about as well as you'd expect it to; unless you're listening to Gucci Mane, it's hard to find trapping funny. And this movie lacks all of the deadpan hilarity found in a lot of the hip-hop based on the same subject matter.

Overall, Next Day Air's definitely worth a watch if you can find it cheap, as it's a decent comedy, and even better if you're interested in the genre this film falls under. I'll be watching it again, and can see myself enjoying it more upon consecutive views; however, it's nothing groundbreaking, and it doesn't set out to be.

Trap Goin' Ham

Maybe it's because my favorite rapper's in jail (Gucci Mane), and everyone else I bumped last year is either there with him (Max B, Lil' Wayne, Lil Boosie), recovering from getting shot (Waka Flocka Flame), losing any insight of what made their music infectious (OJ Da Juiceman, Gorilla Zoe, Shawty Lo), or just, not doing anything at the moment (Drake, Kid Cudi, Jay Electronica, Kanye West), but I've been reaching out for new hip-hop artists to check out; not neccessarily new as in the unheard of sense, but emcees I haven't given a proper chance.

Maybe it's because since then, I've been listening to lyrically lyrical acts like Atmosphere, old Mobb Deep, Mos Def, Curren$y, and the like - those rappers the rest of the blogosphere wet their panties for everytime they mention a new project. I'm not a fan of most of these rappers, as the skinny-jean hipster demographic isn't the one I belong to, even if some of my favorite rappers fall under that horribly mislabeled sub-genre. Which is why duke I'm about to cover (ayo) today seems like a perfect fit for me; a street-level rapper who seems to be bewilderingly adored by journalists who listen to Animal Collective and Aesop Rock, and probably knew who Owl City were long before that fucking Fireflies song gave me the urge to kill each and every nuthuggingdenimfaggot out there.

Pill - "Trap Goin Ham" from The Educated Villains on Vimeo.

Dude's name is Pill, and he's the (former) weed-carrier of (former) OutKast weed-carrier Killer Mike. Despite the fact that he was once a weed carrier's weed carrier, and hardly even third-tier in the hip-hop echelon, Pill has recently become more relevant than his mentor Killer Mike, and even, dare I say, OutKast. At the very least, Pill gets more media attention everytime he drops a new track than Big Boi does, mainly because Pill's actually going to drop his debut album, and Sir Luscious Left Foot feels like a pipe dream that'll never come to fruition. The above track, Trap Goin' Ham, is the track that caught Pill all this love in the New York Times and the New Yorker, amongst other credible sources for what Starbucks-going, beret wearing folks should be listening to when they want their tastes to be a little more "multi-cultural."

I was not feeling this track, nor Pill, at all when I first heard it. To me, it feels like Pill is trying far too hard to be a lyrical trap rapper; a dude who wears baggy jeans, sells crack, and rolls around the hood fucking underage bitches (well, basically) with a bandana sticking out of his pocket who still appeals to hipsters because he feels kinda bad about it. A trapper the blogs could champion because he's not as pop as T.I., as materialistic as Gucci, as raw as Jeezy, or as fake as Ross; despite the fact that all four of those rappers are much more engaging, and generally, better overall artists.

Basically, he's like Waka Flocka, if you stripped Waka of his adlibs and personality, and gave him a conscious and a dictionary. Most people would derail me, and have me hung upside down from the Sears Tower if they saw me make such a comparison, but it's the truth. Both are stylistically similar, both are from Atlanta, both of them trap; shit, they almost look alike, if you don't take into account that Waka's 8' tall and Pill hasn't done a photoshoot that hasn't involved a box of Ritz crackers.

 

Gutter.

However, as evidenced here, and on the rest of his 4075: The Refill mixtape, Pill actually is a great rapper. Although he's not the most interesting of rapper, and seems to fall under the Pitchfork/okayplayer umbrella simply because he's an impoverished youth who channels the pain in his hood and virtually nothing else (as great as he is, Pill reminds me a lot of Mobb Deep on the Infamous/Hell On Earth; a gritty hustler who has no semblance on the idea of "having fun"). It also helped that Andre 3000 co-signed him (but didn't he technically co-sign DJ Unk, too?).

So, yes, my hate of hipsters trying to steal my music has once again made me ignorantly reject a talented emcee; I issue an apology to Pill. Although he's not the God-send folks make him out to be, Pill is a highly-skilled rapper who has the concept of song-making down and also has more than one-dimension to his being. That's something a lot of his peers can't say, especially the song-making part. Give him a chance.

Resident Evil 5: Lost in Nightmares Review

A few days ago I saw on the PSN that Capcom just released its first of two announced Resident Evil 5 episode DLC. I got mad at myself for trading in my copy of it to purchase something else, but today I stumbled upon something on Xbox Live. In addition to the DLC, Xbox is offering Resident Evil 5 as apart of it's "Games on Demand" line, best 30 dollars I've spent all year. So I got me a new copy of the game through Xbox, and the DLC. Along with Lost in Nightmares you get a new mode called "Mercenaries Reunion" with Barry Burton from the first RE game, and some new achievements to earn. The gameplay dosent stray away from Resident Evil 5's gameplay at all. Though there is a supposedly hidden easter egg that unlocks the Resident Evil static camera from the first game, if you dont want to play under 4 and 5's over the shoulder perspective.

The Story goes from a point in the actual RE5 game where Chris Tells Shiva about the last time him and Jill worked together. And that's where Lost in Nightmares picks up. Chris and Jill Valentine are sent to a Mansion to capture Spencer Ashford (I believe?) by the BSAA. Once inside, some old memories come back to them. You half expect a dog to come crashing through the windows down the hallway. After you spend the first few minutes inside the mansion, you go underground to the basment. And Discover all the experiments that Spencer has been conducting on people. While there you encouter 5 giant monsters carring what looks like an anchor that he swings at you. 3 of them you'll have to trap to kill in order to get a collection of items that turn into a key. And after that you meet up with the most vile man in Resident Evil.

Albert Wesker. Seriously, I LOVE that name, it's so good I wish I thought of it. Anyway, names aside. Wesker is the boss in this chapter. And pretty much plays like he did in the main game for Resident Evil 5, well the first time you mean. You really don't defeat him. Infact, when you first see him in LM, it starts the cutscene from RE5 that Chris tells Shiva about, and after the fight it finishes the same cutscene. Overall this isnt anything that's gonna add hours upon hours of gameplay to RE5, but it's a nice addition. The Lost Nightmare Chapter lasts about an hour and a half to two hours of game play, depending on how long you get lost in the basement maze. I never ever, use maps in games, but I had to for this part of the game. The cost you're gonna be spending on this DLC is about 5.00. Not to bad, but you get what you pay for. Long time Resident Evil fans will rejoice at the team up of Chris and Jill again, along with the dialouge that references the first game. New comers will enjoy it as well, if you loved RE5. And by the way, in total to Download the game, and the DLC it cost me about 36. Dollars, however know that in the next month Capcom will be releasing Resident Evil 5: Gold Edition. WIth Lost in Nightmares, and the second DLC content on the disc as well. If you don't own Resident Evil 5, and dont want to get it from Games on Demand I suggest you wait for Gold Edition. On the other hand this is a nice little addition to RE5 if you do have a copy, or want to download the game from Xbox live. Lost in Nightmares does leave a lot to be desired. But the experience isnt too bad, its so-so. Resident Evil 5: Lost in Nightmares for the Xbox 360 gets a 3/5.

I just wanna be a big rock star

Dear god, did I just title this post after a line from a Nickelback song? Yes, yes I did. God save me. Anyway. This is my second installment of Cheap Ass Video Game Reviews, featuring Rock Band, which you can pick up at Gamestop for 12.99(Used, disc only). I mentioned before I used to have a PS3 before I got my current one, and one of the games I had for it was Guitar Hero World Tour. Now after I traded in my old PS3 for my Xbox, I Kept the World Tour set because I knew I would get a PS3 again eventually, and I did not want it to go to waste. Recently I've been using the set to play Guitar Hero Metallica, but after discovering through various websites that the Guitar Hero controllers will indeed work with Rock Band I decided to pick up a copy of it myself since it was so cheap, and I already played through the song list on Metallica. And indeed the controllers work very well, so dont waste over 400 dollars buying both sets, they'll work just fine.

It took me a second to get used to the presentation of Rock Band vs. Guitar Hero because I had never played a Rock Band game before, so I was all set and ready for the little circles coming down the highway, instead of the rectangles. Really and truly theres not much to say about this game, but thats not a bad thing. If you played one music game, essentally you've played them all. They're just different songs, and for 13 bucks its really not a bad deal if you're bored with your current set list. Some things stick out like a sore thumb in this game though, like how come the bass player in my 'band' looks totally out of place, and retarded? They have a solo mechanic that seems about as tacked on as a guitar solo in a recent Metallica song. It just seems there because "hey, these songs have solos, lets make this part of the board light up!" and dosent offer much for spontanatey like many bands do live when playing, you know doing something a little different in the solos to get a rise from the crowd. The solo mechanic dosen't add much, but its not bad or anything either.

The game's career mode is about the same as Guitar Hero's. You'll start off with some easy songs, and when I mean easy I mean like God Damn, theres no inspiration from these bands easy. All of the songs you begin with are Punk songs, and not from any good Punk bands aside from the Clash. And every single one is so predictable it just leaves you waiting for the real challenge to kick in. But as with all Band games, it's quite addicting, to me at least. You just cant stop playing, because you want to play some of your favorite songs that are listed on the game. Overall this game is good, and not bad for 12.99 (Used, disc only). Rock Band for the PS3 gets a 4/5.

Excalibur's Edge III: Gimmick Pay-Per-Views

Today WWE's official website was updated with the following Pay-Per-View Schedule:

March 28: Wrestlemania 26
April 25: Extreme Rules
May 23: WWE Wild Card
June 20: Fatal Four Way
July 18: Money in the Bank
August 15: Summer Slam
September 19: Night of Champions
October 3: Hell in a Cell

Some names dropped, (Backlash, Judgement Day, The Bash) And some were shifted around (Extreme Rules, Night of Champions) but also three were added in place of the three dropped (Fatal Four Way, Money in the Bank, and Wild Card) I have no Idea what this "Wild Card" Pay-Per-View event will be, but the other two are what concerns me. Last year, 2009, WWE held five ladder matches on pay-per-view over the course of the year. Four too many I believe, then to top it off they held a pay-per-view event centered around Ladder Matches. Why? This In My Opinion shows complete lack of faith in the talent and how it will end up hurting the company in the long term. Welcome to:

Excalibur's Edge III: Gimmick Pay-Per-Views


Vince McMahon is someone many will be quick to point the finger at and go "Wtf? really?" but I don't believe he is to blame. As of this moment he is acting CEO of World Wrestling Entertainment INC. Due to Lind McMahon and her political hopes of sitting at the senate. Vince McMahon is a busy man, especially more so now that he has to take over Linda's Job as CEO. And if you don't know what a CEO of a major corporation does, especially if that corporation is owned by a McMahon, basically the job is to keep track of the companies vision, handle external forces that either help or hurt said company, and keep everyone in line, basically. If your last name's McMahon that also means you probably don't get anymore than 3 hours of sleep, if you're lucky. Because the McMahon's are some of the most involved businessmen/women in their own company, there's no "Eh, Ill take care of it later" mentality in the office if your a McMahon. Vince Russo said in an interview once that Vince was always the first person at the office, and the last to leave. Now he probably dosen't leave.

And many say, Russo and Jim Cornette among them, that Vince surrounds himself with "Yes Men", people who tell him what he wants to hear, not what he needs to hear, but when he gets the chance to breathe from all the chaos his life might be right now he'll take a moment to realize that what he's hearing isnt what he needs, he's just waiting for someone to challenge that "Yes Man" mentality. So to combat sagging Pay-Per-View buy rates, in a down turned economy, the decision seems to have been made to put on Gimmick Pay-Per-Views. Which for the short term, like any hot-shotting, will work, but in the long term will not pay off. And here's why I believe so. WWE currently charges around 40 dollars for their Pay-per-view(PPV) events. They run one a month, sometimes two. If you're the type of person that loves wrestling period with a disposable income, you're spending around 80 dollars a month on the product, 110, if you buy TNA's and I wont go into how much you're spending if you buy UFC events when they have them.

So give or take a few dollars, you're spending on average 40 dollars or more a month on a wrestling PPV. Now this Extreme Rules PPV is coming up following Wrestlemania, one of the "extreme" matches that WWE usually promotes is a Ladder Match, so that's one you can mark down. Now, if two individuals get into an intense program, its 99.9 percent possible the final match between them will end with a ladder match, which you can mark as two. Not to mention the Money in The Bank match at Wrestlemania, and another one with a PPV dedicated soley to it, thats 4. Then at the end of the year, guess what? The Ladder Match PPV. Now, do you really want to pay 40 dollars for a match you've seen four times already? It would be like if you bought a DVD, 20 dollars, but everytime you watched it you had to pay 20 dollars. No one would do that unless they just had heaps of disposable income. Which most of us don't.

So, what it will end up doing is killing the match. Whose gonna pay that much money for a match you've seen 4 or more times already? Probably involving the same people. Not only that but it in my opinion, takes the excitement out of the storyline the two men are involved in. Take the recent Hell in a Cell pay-per-view. Now. The match of John Cena/Randy Orton I believe warranted one of those matches because the two had been feuding for a while, off and on over the course of a few years. But the other one? CM Punk and Undertaker. When did they ever had a match of any significance that warranted a Hell in a Cell match, aside from the only match they had together one month prior. The hell in a cell match, I believe, has always been the trump card that no one wants to use. But when something gets so intense, where two people hate each other one of two things seems to always happen. Either A: Someone like Vince, or Eric Bischoff, got tired of the two men having matches, and getting cheated, or ruining their show with the excessive brawling that they felt there was no other choice but to make it a hell in a cell. The other thing that would happen (B:) was that one of the wrestlers involved would do something so desperate, that the other would call hell in a cell. The ultimate evil. The Atomic Bomb of wrestling matches.

It made it exciting, it made it unpredictable. But guess what? Next October you already know whats gonna happen. If John Cena and Triple H are in a storyline together guess what? It's gonna be in a Hell in a Cell match. Wheres the excitement, wheres the build? wheres the damn story? WWE thinks it's some sort of entertainment company, which in truth they are, but they're wrestling. The people outside of the McMahons need to realize that you just cant do that shit in wrestling, because well, heres an analogy. Back in the day, like in the 50s, 60s, etc. Wrestling promoters would do a midget match once a year. This was something a lot of people hadn't seen before so when they did the matches, they'd get a huge turn out. Eventually someone got the bright idea to have a bunch more than usual. And what happened? Well, it killed that match. It wasnt a special attraction anymore. And that is what will happen with these gimmick pay-per-views. Even if there is a compelling story involved, in time itll just become over saturation. But I understand too, the branding they're trying to do.

The Royal Rumble, is the January tradition. It's what gets you excited for Wrestlemania. 30 men compete for the main event title shot at Wrestlemania. They're trying to do the same for "Elimination Chamber" This is the second year they've had two championship chamber matches on the same show, in a row. They're trying to build the February PPV up as the Champions last shot to headline Wrestlemania, almost as if its a tournament style program, where your challenger wins his big match, then the champion wins theirs so now you know for sure whose gonna be in the main event. That's what they're trying to do with these other events, as well as boost sales, is so Hell in a Cell, becomes a "Fall tradition", much like Survivor Series is WWE's Thanksgiving tradition, and so on and so forth. It's a commendable idea in reality, but over using gimmick matches just kills them. I think what? TNA's ran like 50 Ultimate X matches, and now I personally could care less about the match. They run like 10 a year. And Lockdown itself is just a reason to gimmick, a gimmick match if you get me.

This is, in my opinion, just like hot-shotting a title belt. Belts in wrestling don't mean anything anymore. With gaurenteed contracts and such, the Champion won't make anymore money with or without that belt, but to make things interesting you can't have everyone win it in the span of a month. It makes the title look too easy to win, and thus kills any heat between the two guys fighting for it because, most people would think "oh well, Edge is going to win the belt tonight, cause Randy won it last month, and Cena won it the month before. " It takes the fun out of, if someone will win it or not. I believe its ok for two guys to play hot-potatoe with the belt, if and only if they're the only ones trading it, because it just shows that those two guys are on an equal level.

Got off on a tanget. but you get the idea, or you should. Running a gimmick pay-per-view, more than one anyway, for me takes the fun out of the story. And well, I dont know many people who'd be willing to pay 40 dollars for the same thing they just saw a month ago.

D-Lo - No Hoe (remix) (feat. E-40, Beeda Weeda & The Jacka) [Video]

The official song of Valentine's Day 2009. E-40 essentially kills this track. D-Lo's chorus is as much gibberish as it's ever been, especially in censored form (DLAH, DLAH, DLAH GIVE **** BOUT NAH HAH). I'm not sure why people from the Bay Area can't speak proper English (so many of them sound like Keak Da Sneak's offspring), perhaps it's something in the water? That would explain all the fucked up Californians I've met in my life. None of them remotely as cool as 40 Water, or decisively deranged as D-Lo, but they've been some weird fucks regardless.

Beeda Weeda does okay himself, pretty unremarkable. Jacka, who is apparently some type of God in the Bay Area, also compliments the song with his signature flow. I haven't listened to Jacka since his debut, The Jack Artist, dropped back in '05, and he was talking about purple-kush on that Barney track. That song slapped, regardless.

Anyway, this was on D-Lo's debut, The Tonite Show With D-Lo, which I've still yet to check out fully, and I suppose it's also being used to hype his upcoming major label (?) debut. If anything, it's got me far more excited for E-40's duel-albums dropping in March, Revenue Retrievin': Day Shift & Night Shift.

Percy Jackson and The Olympians: The Lightning Theif Rewview

Percy Jackson and The Olympians: The Lightning Thief

Yesterday I had the chance to catch the Lightning Thief. The latest movie adaption of the many teenage adventure novels. Percy Jackson (Logan Lerman) is a regular teenager with dsylexia, ADHD, and a horrible step father, seem familar? Turns out hes really the son of Posiden, no no that movie with Kurt Russel. Poisden, the Greek God of the Seas. Turns out also, that Greek God's exist, and they sometimes mate with mortals to make DemiGods. Percy joins the ranks of Hercules, Achilles, and Perseus as a DemiGod. And he is unaware of this fact until Hades (Steve Coogan) starts to hunt him down. Apparently someone has stolen Zeus' most powerful lightning bolt and Percy is named the prime suspect, due to his connection with Posiden Zeus' and Hades' brother. With help from his new friends, Percy looks to bargan with Hades by telling him he didn't steal it so he can get his mother back from his grasp.

Overall this movie is your normal teen chosen to save the world but cant come to grips with being a savoir cause hes so young-movie. Well, almost. Early in the movie Percy gains confidence in his abilities, which is something that sets him apart from his other counterparts. He believes he really can get Hades to give him his mother back with his explanation, and dosen't pout over the fact that hes only a teenager who has to save the world. Alexandria Daddrio plays Athena's daughter, Annabeth, and love interest. Shes a tough chick who quickly joined the ranks of my personal favorite hot young actresses who rock list, along with Emma Stone, and Ellen Page. Her story is simple, she just wants to see the world. Never had she been outside the walls of Camp Half-Blood, a camp for training of the DemiGods.

The two are joined by Percy's personal protector and token black guy, Grover(Brandon T. Jackson) a satyr, for those who dont know a satyr is like Pan, the Greek God of Nature, I believe. Basically Grover has goat legs. And from time to time acts like one too, a goat I mean. Aside from being Percy's protector, Grover throws in some lines you'd expect from a black guy hanging with two white kids, imo. He serves a purpose, especially at the end, wont spoil it. But most of his lines arent far from "That's wack." and other token black guy movie phrases. I never read the novel so I couldn't tell you how well it compares. But as a stand a lone movie, its pretty good. I think they'll amp up the stuff in the sequel. But I'm sure that the fans of the novels will love seeing these characters come to life on the screen. The visual effects are great too. Nothing looks particularly bad. In fact nothing about this movie is particularly bad, but nothing blows you away either. It's right in the middle. Also Rosario Dawson cameo's as Hades' wife, and well. If she really was then you can send me to hell anytime. There are other movies that are out right now that might be more worth seeing, so if you have hesitations about it, just wait for the DVD release.

Overall it's an enjoyable movie, but dosen't seem to have the power to knock the Behemoth of Avatar down a peg. It's a 3/5.