Defendor [REVIEW]

Woody Harrelson comes fresh off his career-reviving role in Zombieland with the dark comedy/super hero drama, Defendor. Defendor got its first trailer not long after Kick Ass, another satrical look at super heroes, got its first; however, Defendor was far less hyped, had a much smaller budget, and got pushed in and out of theaters far quick February of this year. Having not seen Kick Ass yet, I can't compare the two films, and despite the fact that both involve regular people portraying realistic vigilantes in a comedic light, I've been told they're both far different films.

Defendor, at its core, is an homage of sorts to two DC classics, most obviously Batman, although, also the Watchmen, notably Rorschach. Woody Harrelson's Defendor is an innocent, albeit moderately slow grown men who never had anyone to idolize in his life other than our modern legends, that of comic book super heroes. Not to give away any spoilers, but he never knew his father, his mother was taken from him at a young age, and he was raised by his stubborn, bitter old grandfather. Taking both elements of Batman and Rorschach's histories, Arthur Poppington (Harrelson's true idenity) is a combination of both those character if they were less batshit crazy, and had more childlike innocence.

Defendor is looking for his arch-enemy, Captain Industry, which is nothing more than an industry for the drug game. He goes around beating the shit out of lowly criminals, before one night saving a crackwhore (well, she is) from a corrupt cop/dopeboy. This starts off the film's main story, and also establishes our heroes' kinda love interest, in a creepy "I'm old enough to be her father, so we'll never genuinely embrace" way. Also, the crackwhore is played by the lovely Kat Dennings, of Nick and Norah fame.

oh, those ashy lips.

Regardless, Defendor finds his Captain Industry, and hunts him till the bitter end. Honestly, this film is just fucking great. Woody Harrelson's career has been rejuvenated, and thank God for that. The man is just an amazing comedic/action star, and he's just so capable of making the audience feel sympathy for his character. Between this and Tallahasse, Harrelson is back in prime-form, and needs to keep getting these great starring roles to further enforce his standing. Woody's proven himself to be Ron Perlman levels of bad-ass, and deserves that same attention and respect.

The writing/directing, handled by Peter Stebbings, a first time director, is genuinely excellent. Very atmospheric, and moody when it needs to be, while the comedic timing is still precise. The supporting cast is great at keeping the film rooted in reality, when Defendor's antics can get intentionally campy. It's hard to pick out any flaws with Defendor; it runs a perfect length, and tells a fantastic original story, something we hardly ever get in the superhero genre.

From the wildly hilarious beginning to the downer, yet mildly uplifting climax, Defendor never loses its focus. It's a great movie that takes the conventions of modern super hero films, and throws them out the window. I'd definitely recommending buying the DVD to any fan of comedy or super heroes, as this is a film you'll want to watch again and again.

Date Night [REVIEW]

The king and queen of NBC's primetime Thursday TV schedule hook up for their first movie together, and it's about as great as you'd expect. Date Night is a rom-com/crime thriller that goes above and beyond most Hollywood comedies in terms of quality, and genuine hilarity. And honestly, after looking at the credits for this film, and considering the plot, it's rather surprising how well this film turned out in the end.

With the director of such horrible comedic failures such as the Night at the Museum movies, Cheaper By The Dozen, and the Pink Panther, and a writer whose only other contributions have been to Shrek The Third, this film looks like it's built for disaster on paper. And honestly, is the directing or the writing top notch? Although the plot is never genuinely overlooked, it's many twists and turns are elementary at best, and some of the scenes would be generely worthless if they weren't readily available for comedic purposes. The directing is nothing ground-breaking, but it holds up well, and all of the scenes are shot with the same flair that was used in the Night at the Museum movies, just in a far more reasonable and rational film.

What really sets this film apart is the all-star cast it sports; Steve Carell (of the Office and The 40 Year Old Virgin) and Tina Fey (of 30 Rock and Saturday Night Live) star in this film, and their supporting cast is absolutely crammed. Ray Liotta, Mark Wahlberg, James Franco, Mila Kunis, and Taraji P. Henson are some of the most noteworthy of this ensemble cast, and all of them hand in first-class performances even when they're not given the the greatest of characters. All of them add another dimension to their characters that make them take off of the screen, and everyone else in the film is equally good.

This is virtually a two-man show though at heart, and you'd think that Fey and Carell have been working together for years with the undeniable chemistry they have in this film. They play the role of a couple lacking excitement in their lives to perfection in the beginning of the film, although their characters aren't too much of a departure from their starring NBC roles. Later in the film, when it comes time for the two to provide more of a connection, they deliver two of the best performances of their career.

Although this film relies heavily on sight gags, the jokes are still sharp, and that's obviously due to the improvisation that both Carell and Fey are famous for. Despite there be so many jokes that rely on the actions taking place on screen, all of them are handled tastefully, and the film never delves off into slap-stick territory. Despite the fact that the plot is very exaggerated, and unlikely, the movie does keep one foot rooted in reality while allowing the unimaginable to help to the characters in the film in the meantime. That's where this film gets most of its charm, too; nothing is unbelievable, but anything that can go wrong, does.

This film stands amongst Pineapple Express and the Hangover as some of the best comedy adventures to have come out in the last two years, and stands out as its own seperate entity due to the romantic comedy elements. Rom-coms are hardly ever this clever, or gut-bustingly funny, and this is one of the few films that take the buddy comedy-approach and simply add a couple in their place. In an age where bromance movies are all the rage, Date Night is pretty damn charming,  and commendable for showing that romantic mishaps can be just as funny as drug or alcohol induced escapades.

Gucci Mane - The Burrprint 2: HD [REVIEW]

Gucci Mane. A genius to some, a retard to others. Very few rappers (outside of Lil' Wayne and Cam'ron, who're his most contemporary peers) have ever attracted this much split affection/hatred, and very few can actually grasp the idea of him as an artist. On the surface, he's a very shallow artist, who can't stop rapping about his jewelry, cars, women, or trap-roots. He's hard to decipher (at times, nearly indecipherable), because his accent is rooted in an Alabama slur, he has a lisp, and his delivery, which varies on nearly every song he appears on, is a slivering, sliding, snake-like whisper which rarely breaks free from the monotony of his inflection.

His character is that of a real life villain. He has killed at least one person in his life (in self-defense), he's stolen pretty much every dude in Atlanta's girlfriend for at least a night, he wears more jewelry than Liberace, he has more money than the last five generations of your family tree, and he probably sold crack to your grandma. He's a very easy target for hip-hop purists, and he's simply a very easy individual to hate. He's an asshole, and he doesn't give a fuck what you think; honestly, he's that bad-ass that almost every man has wanted to be at least one point in their lives. 

But he's also probably one of the most honest, and unadulerated artists in any genre of music. He's gained an extremely loyal cult fanbase that rivals that of the aforementioned Lil' Wayne and Cam'ron, and last year, after all that grinding, he finally broke into the mainstream and he's now getting the attention he deserves. He's honestly one of the most personable artists I've ever listened to; when you listen to Gucci's music, you feel like you know him. How can you get so attached to someone that's lived a life that makes most others look insignificant in comparison? Because at the end of each album, mixtape, or song, it is abundantly clear; Gucci Mane is no super villain, he's merely a human. 

He's as fragile, and frail as the rest of us; but he is simply a survivor. Listening to Gucci lets you live vicariously through his lyrics; each song is a triumph in itself. His self-depreciating lyrics, deadpan sense of humor, and very understated intelligence makes him one of the most vulnerable artists in hip-hop. At the same time, his "don't give a fuck what anyone thinks" attitude pretty much tells you that you can try to take a swing at him; but you're likely to end up dead behind the local middle school if you do. That same attitude also allows him to make some of the strangest, experimental, and quite simply avant garde rap the genre has ever seen. Don't misunderstand that, this isn't arthouse rap; this isn't music that's trying to be smart. This is very self-aware trap rap that is merely a veil for a man who's afraid to get too personal on his records, so he merely drops the struggles he's faced in his life amidst all the gun and jewelry talk, usually to the point that if you're not listening (and most Gucci fans AND haters aren't listening) you'll completely miss it.

In all of his interviews, you see someone that's nothing like the Gucci Mane character that is so predominant in his music. You see Radric Davis, the thirty year old who is soft-spoken, well-educated, and surprisingly wise beyond his years. He's lived five lifetimes in those thirty years; this is a man who had to grow up from the time he was just a child, and never had the opportunity to look back. And maybe this is why his fanbase is so loyal, so attached to him; because he's just so damn relatable.

Gucci's in jail right now, and this is a compilation of songs that he recorded late last year, all of them showing the VERY huge leap he took as an artist from sometime in mid-08 until late-09. There's about a dozen guest features, yet it doesn't feel like it; maybe because over half of them are on the all-star trap anthem "Coca Coca." This mixtape combines all of Gucci's styles, and flows, and puts it in an easily digestable format. From the intro, which is a live freestyle from jail over the phone (including the "One Minute Remaining" message for authenticity), until the very last song, this is a journey into Gucci Land. Weird metaphores, outbursts of singing, GENUINE singing on Antisocial, which is one of the strangest songs in all of Gucci's huge catalog, a whole dictionary full of adlibs, some of the best beats in modern hip-hop supplied by Drumma Boy, Fat Boi, and the rest of Gucci's usual suspects.

There is far too many songs to do a track by track analysis, and honestly, Gucci is the type of artist who is better understood by listening to a full album instead of listening to individual tracks. Simply put, there's something for everyone on hear, and this is just some of the funnest music you'll hear all year long. It's obvious before he got locked up, Gucci was feeling on top of the world, and this mixtape shows that. But then again, when isn't he?

Support the kid. This is some of the best music you'll hear all year, and just makes the wait for him to get out even more unbearable. At least until then we have The Burrprint 2; another defining statement by one of hip-hop's most misunderstood artists.

The Broke Gamer Review: Mirror's Edge

Usually I post some video game reviews under the title "Cheap ass games", but I've decided to re-title the posts as "The Broke Gamer Review".




It's a Friday night, you've got nothing to do, and can only spare about 20 dollars, its time to head down to your local video game store and pick up something cheap for your broke ass. Welcome to The Broke Gamer Review.



Mirror's Edge is an action platformer presented in a First Person view format. Make no mistakes this is no first person shooter. Retailing for about 17.99 (Used at Gamestop) Mirror's Edge is a fun and fast paced video game for under twenty dollars. Sometime in the future you play as Faith, a runner. Runner's are like couriers but they get to shoot people, better think twice about stiffing the bike messenger next time. They run here, run there. Giving people info, taking info, generally doing things against the 'law' in this city. Faith becomes caught up in a scandal when her sister is framed for killing a would be Mayoral Candidate and she is looking for the real killer and answers as to why her sister was framed.

Now, I said it's not a first person shooter, but there are guns you can use in the game. However the entire game is based on running, and no it's not some treacherous Nintendo deal that disguises exercise as a video game. You run everywhere, and anytime you have a gun it slows you down, the bigger the gun the slower you run. In fact the entire game pretty much tells you to avoid the enemy at all costs, unless you cant help but not to. Basically youll run everywhere, and jump over everything. It's a great experience to be had. The game is totally different and unique from any other. The city is pure White, beautiful colors mixed in with it as well. It gives the game an overall look that separates it from other things out there. And the cut scenes, are all done in an anime style format, no CGI which itself gives it something that separates it from other games.

The running is highly addictive and when you're on a roll, it really sucks to get stopped just cause you didnt jump at the right point, or ducked too early, and youll just stop, it makes it worse when theres enemies shooting at you, and you're more than likely to get killed when something slows you down. And you better hope that you can grab that ledge if not youll fall all the way to ground at a velocity that probably liquefies Faith. The story itself is forgettable, and theres no interesting characters in it that really make you want to continue the story, however the gameplay drives the story itself. FPS fans might be turned off when they find out that it isnt a run and gun adventure game. And if you get motion sickness really easy I wouldn't recommend playing it. The developers put a little dot in the center of the screen, giving the illusion of a cross-hair, to make you focus on that area so you wont get sick, but still it could be hard for those who suffer from the illness to play it. And the dot, despite looking like a cross hair, isn't. It's just there for that purpose, trying to aim with it is about fifty-fifty on accuracy.

Overall it's a great game that sets it apart from anything out there, but nothing story or character wise is truly memorable, and it seems sometimes that even if you nail the button right and jump right the game will still make you miss your target, or hit something to slow you down. Mirror's Edge gets a 3/5.

MGMT - Congratulations [REVIEW]

A lot of people aren't going to like this album, and most of those people were fans of Oracular Spectacular. However, if you weren't on the MGMT bandwagon before this album, I wouldn't hop on here, either. This album is strictly MGMT; a very immersive, and overindulgent affair by Andrew VanWyngarden and Ben Goldwasser, that is as self-aware and paranoid as its predecessor, yet far more personal, and adventurous.

It starts off with the first transition listeners will have into MGMT's far more folk-driven experience, which is It's Working. It's one of the less experimental efforts on the album, and feels more like something on Oracular Spectacular than anything else; at the same time, it's lush landscape, and beautiful vocals make this a grand introduction to what's about to follow. The "surfer-rock with gothic undertones" vibe starts with this song, and never lets up. If you threw The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, the Beach Boys, Pink Floyd, The Flaming Lips, and Nine Inch Nails into a blender, you might be able to come up with half of the elements that the following 8 tracks of this album is about to comprise of. 

A Song For Dan Treacy, based on Television Personalites frontman, Dan Treacy, follows. Here's where the album really starts to distanct MGMT from its roots; if anyone remembers that scene in Tim Burton's Ed Wood where Vampira waves her hands frantically to entrance viewers while that demonically groovy music plays in the background, this is basically that, but with MGMT. 

 Someone's Missing & Flash Delirium follow, and these two songs are possibly the most single-ready of an album with no singles. The former is a beautiful, yet tragically short song that takes all of the best elements of the bands sound, and has Andrew tell a great story lyrically over one of the album's most beautiful arrangements. The latter is the first song leaked from the album, and it's just fucking fantastic. Like a bad-trip gone awkardly right, Flash Delirium is one of the most hauntingly funny songs I've heard in my twenty-one years, including lyrics such as the "hot dog's getting cold," followed by self-aware lyrics like "you'll never be as good as the Rolling Stones." I'll be damned if they aren't trying.

I Found A Whistle maybe the least grabbing song on the album, although it is also one of the more eclectic ones. It stood out to me more than most of the songs on first listen, however, it's lacking the power that the rest of the album really charges with. Siberian Breaks follows, and it's a 12 minute opus. Some people say that this track feels bloated, and I can emphasize. However, in that twelve minute running time, MGMT manages to include almost all of the elements of their past work, and run with it in a song that is just extravagent more-so than self-indulgent.

Brian Eno follows, and it's probably my favorite song on the album. Based on the super-producer who helped expand the ambient music genre, Brian Eno sounds like a dark retelling of the Munsters theme thematically, and tells an absolutely hilarious, and depraved tale lyrically. Brian Eno is something of a God in MGMT's world, and this song honestly reminds me, at least lyrically, of early Primus records. A goofy song that neither satires or parodies anyone or anything, and still goes about it in a very serious, and enjoyable way. Brian Eno is like MGMT's Mr. Krinkle.

Lady Dada's Nightmare, which is awarded with the best song title of the year, is an instrumental piece of work done by the band. Perhaps inspired by Lady GaGa (y'think?), although this song sounds nothing at all like her music; it provides a sparse, surrealistic sound in the beginning, and gets downright demented in the second half, which is filled with gruesome screams of terror. Although the band doesn't provide any lyrics in this song, this is one of my personal favorites from the album; this does sound like a soundtrack to anyone's nightmares, and most of mine do include Lady GaGa.

Congratulations ends with the title track, which is one of the easiest listens of the whole album. Very laid back, and celebratory, this is basically the bend looking back at the past two years of their career, both scathingly, and with reluctance. It's obvious that MGMT never wanted to end up where they're at in their career, and hope to change their stance as hipster demigods with this album by half-alienating their fanbase, and half revealing who they really are. It's a fantastic song that caps of an absolutely breathtaking album.

Congratulations isn't for everyone. To keep it short, it's absolutely FUCKING WEIRD. Magestic at the same time, this is MGMT's most cohesive effort yet, and they completely derail the idea of a sophomore slump. I'd suggest checking out OS if you haven't listened to the band yet, as it's far, far easier to digest than it's successor. However, after you're familiar with the band and their eccentricities, give Congratulations a few spins. This maybe the early album of the year in any genre.

Meth, Ghost & Rae - Wu-Massacre [REVIEW]

I love the Wu-Tang Clan. One of the very first hip-hop acts I ever listened to; Enter the 36 Chambers also being one of the first albums I've ever heard. Their debut, and every album leading up until their second group effort, Wu-Tang Forever, is classic, almost flawless displays in what hip-hop is capable of when fully utilized. GZA, RZA, Ol' Dirty Bastard, Raekwon, Ghostface Killah, and Method Man were always at the forefront of the group, while Masta Killa, U-God, and Inspectah Deck played the lesser known, but still great soldiers; the first sect of that group, the cousins, have changed a lot during the years. ODB unfortunately passed away, while GZA fell off into monotony and RZA decided to film movie scores instead of focus on albums, since the former career is far more lucrative. The second is the group we'll be discussing today.

Ghostface Killah has always been the most consistent of anyone on the Wu-Tang; he really has never released a bad album, and yes, I'm including Ghostdini. His oft-P.I.C. Raekwon has two classics under his belt, the landmark Only Built 4 Cuban Linx and its sequel. Method Man is probably the most well known of all the Wu-Tang, as he has become something of a household name since "M.E.T.H.O.D. Man" dropped 18 years ago. In 2010, they're really the best the Wu has to offer. Which is what makes this album rather dissapointing.

Now, is it their fault this album doesn't live up to expectations? Not completely, no. A lot of the blame rests on Def Jam's shoulders. They rushed the project along, and hyped it up in epic proportions. They're really expecting great sales, or media attention from this album, so they've released FOUR singles, 3 alternate album covers, one music video, and one promotional mixtape since this project was announced three months ago. All of these covers were designed by famed comic book artist, Chris Bachalo, of Generation X & Death fame. Four singles were released, that makes up one-third of this 12 track album; and two of those tracks are 30 second skits.

So, yes, there's around 30 minutes, at most, of music on this project. 6 of the 10 songs clock in at under 3 minutes long; which hurts the product extremely, especially with tracks like Criminology 2.5 and Mef Vs. Chef 2, both of which are only 2 minutes long. I suppose they live up to the "2" in their names.

None of the songs really grab you, at all. A part of the problem really is the incredibly-aggitating length of the records, which, I don't understand how they completely blame Def Jam for. Did Def Jam really cut Criminology 2.5 in HALF because of time restraints? I doubt it. I have no idea why Raekwon's verse was cut off, nor why Ghost's was taken from No Man's Land, a bonus cut off of OB4CL2. Mef Vs. Chef 2 has the best production on the album, but 2:01 is NOT enough. It feels like an interlude. In fact, most rappers' interludes are longer than most of these songs. This is hard to classify as genuine MUSIC at this length. I understand that They wanted to show off their liquid swords, but damn guys, HOW HARD IS IT TO ADD A FUCKING HOOK?

And talk about more than fucking guns already, huh? We know, you're raw. You're hard. You're the hardest rappers out there. But honestly, you criticize Waka Flocka for not having lyrics, and saying rappers of your ilk are outta touch, when you're not covering any ground that Waka or any of these other young "trappers, not rappers" are covering, and you can't even afford the time to write a hook. Honestly, you guys ARE out of touch, no matter how much it hurts me to say that. The difference being that these other rappers are in their early to mid twenties, and you guys are almost old enough to be their fathers. Come on guys, grow up.

I don't understand it, honestly. OB4CL2 was fantastic, and Ghostdini was a great approach in another direction for Ghost. Those albums came out about 6 months ago, respectively. And this is what they come up with as a follow up? You can't completely blame Def Jam for this, and their time restraints. Even with more songs, these guys weren't really going anywhere with this effort. In fact, there really isn't any effort. It comes off more as a quick attempt to grab cash from hardcore Wu-heads by Meth, Ghost, Rae AND Def Jam. I feel like they're all in cohoots to rob us, especially with all the hyped and alternate cover BS going into this project. The marketing is better than the overall product. If only Def Jam put this much effort into their GREAT albums.

It's not all bad, don't get me wrong. Dangerous, Miranda, It's That Wu-Shit, and Our Dreams are all pretty good, if not kinda generic. There's just nothing really great about this album, either. It's just kinda, blah. I doubt anyone'll be listening to this album past April, if they even remember it for anything other than being a failed marketing ploy.

Sorry, Wu. But you left me down this time, and I'm sure you left plenty others down, too. Try harder next time, and try to take some of the blame for once, huh? These are the same guys who blamed RZA entirely for 8 Diagrams being a dissapointment, yet I'd listen to that album again over this.

Heavy Rain review

Finally. One of the most anticipated games of 2010 was released this past Tuesday, February 23rd. But does it live up to the hype and expectations? Heavy Rain, not only does so but mows down all of those as well. Heavy Rain is the story of a serial killer who is going around abducting young children and murdering them by allowing them to drown. The story revolves around four different characters who are all connected through the murders. And each of them plays out in a different genre of film. No not game, film. To say Heavy Rain is a "Game" in a traditional sense, would be a wrong classification. The developer, Quantic Dream, calls it an "interactive narritive", while this isnt exactly the most sexiest of terms, it is what it is. The entire game is played out through Quick Time Events(QTE) which if you dont know are usually, as seen in Resident Evil 5, are an interactive cutscene that requires you to press a button at a precise time and depending on if you hit it or not, you either succeede or fail. However unlike other games, if you miss a button press, the scene dosent rewind back and allow you to hit it again, in order to get it right, the story keeps going. It keeps going even the event of a death of one of the characters. Quantic Dream's development team has stated that plays should only play through it once, because the character death's are perminant, in the current play through, and playing it once is like life. But you wont want to do that.
With all the different outcomes it makes you want to play it more to see what happens. A friend of mine who has the game, had a different ending, and story all together because we both did different things. I lost a character, he didnt. He chose to shoot someone that I did not, etc. It makes the game interesting. And gives something to players that very few games have, an individual story. It makes it like your own personal game, yours will be different from others, giving you and other plays a unique take on the Heavy Rain game.

As I stated, each character plays out as a different style of a movie.

Ethan Mars an architect whose son has been kid-napped, and hes giving clues on where to go, and things to do in order to save him. Ethan's story plays out a little like a horror movie. Not so much in the slasher style, but more of a psychological theme. He must crawl over glass, walk through an electrical field, kill a drug dealer, etc. It plays out somewhat like the Saw movies, only less gruesome.
Scott Shelby is a Private Detective investigating the case of the Origami Killer, the name of the serial killer. His story plays out more like a old Humphrey Bogart movie. He runs leads, tracks down suspects. Hell his car and house look like they come right out of the fifties. He is joined by a young woman named Lauren Winters, whose child was also kidnapped by the killer, and killed before the events of the game. Together they form a team, bent on finding the killer.

Norman Jayden is a FBI agent who comes to the city to help the local police with the case. His parts play out like a cop movie, something like The Departed. He dosen't get along at all with the people hes working for, and has a nasty run in with a man named Mad Jack. The only thing missing from Jayden's story is Mark Walhberg.

"Maybe, maybe not. Maybe fuck yourself"

Madison Paige is a concerned third party, so to speak, who finds Ethan hurt and helps him get better, while tracking down some leads of her own. Her story plays out like a thriller. And is easily the most intense of all the game.

The gameplay, well isnt as easy as you think for a bunch of QTEs. The button presses sometimes are so far apart from each other when you have to press more than one, making harder. But this only happens in a really intense situation, so its not like walking is going to have this style of button presses; giving you a sense of rewarding. Because when your in trouble, and those buttons come up, well it looks like you wont survive. And when you do, it gives you an overwhelming feeling of winning. And when you dont, well. You feel bad. But there are also happy moments. Especially the ending, which I wont reveal. But its as close to coming to crying that I have come to, playing a VIDEO GAME. Never, ever have I ever thought about doing that while playing a game. But this one evokes that Much emotion. It wasn't enough to make me shed a tear, but still I think you get the point. There are some downfalls however. Sometimes it seems the button presses dont match up when you press them. And it does becoming incredibly difficult in intense situations. It's not something to take lightly like any other game. It's hard, and dosent get any easier as you continue. Overall, this is a reason to own a PS3 I believe. Along with some other games. Basically:

Heavy Rain + Metal Gear Solid 4 + Uncharted 2 = why the fuck don't you own a PS3?

Heavy Rain for the Playstation 3 gets a 5/5.